TENZING SCOTT BROWN
TABLE OF CONTENTS
All previously aired plays are available to hear or read for 24hrs on a Wednesday (Galloverse Mean Time), up until 35 weeks after the Blackthorn Blossom has burst into bloom in 2024.
Chapter: 1
Written: 2016
THE CHERRY BLOSSOM QUARTET
Aired: the 27th of March 2024
The Cherry Blossom Quartet are the first four plays written by Tenzing Scott Brown. They were written in the Spring of 2016, between the first blossom blooming on the Cherry Tree across the road from his flat near Albion Parade in N16, and the first petal falling from the same tree, less than four weeks later. Each of the plays were topped and tailed by something called Theatre & Me.
Theatre & Me: Part One
BILL DRUMMOND IS DEAD
Theatre & Me: Part Two
TO THE SHORES OF LAKE PLACID
REPOSSESSED
Theatre & Me: Part Three
BETWEEN HEAVEN & HELSINKI
Theatre & Me: Part Four
Chapter: 2
Written: 2016
BEST BEFORE DEATH: Volume Five
Aired: the 3rd of April 2024
Best Before Death: Volume Five was supposed to be a series of twelve plays to be written between early April 2017 and late April 2025. Only the INTRODUCTION to Best Before Death: Volume Five and the first three of these plays ever got written. That said, the Word file containing the first of these plays was corrupted and lost, never to be found. Even its title is lost.
CORRUPTED WORD FILES
THE 25 PAINTINGS
THE LIFE & DEATH OF AN ARTIST
Chapter: 3
Written: 2017
THE CINNAMON SIX
Aired: the 10th of April 2024
The Cinnamon Six are six short plays written by Tenzing Scott Brown in the Autumn of 2017. The Cinnamon Six are framed by conversations between Tenzing and an imaginary character called Cindy.
“Hey, Cindy!” – Part One
FORTY BUNCHES OF DAFFODILS
“Hey, Tenzing!” – Part Two
YOUR DARKEST THOUGHT
“Hey, Drummond!” – Part Three
ANYTHING SCOTLAND?
“Hey, Cindy!” – Part Four
THE LOLLIPOP LADY
“Hey, Cindy!” – Part Five
I’VE BAKED YOU A CAKE
“Hey, Cindy!” – Part Six
THE BED
“Hey, Cindy!” – Part Seven
“Hey, Cindy!” – Part Eight
Chapter: 4
Written: 2017
MEMORY LOSS
Aired: the 17th of April 2024
Memory Loss is a collection of plays written throughout 2018 and much of 2019.
They were written when Bill Drummond was having episodes of memory loss.
Like The Cinnamon Six plays, they are framed with the “Hey, Cindy!” conversations.
“Hey, Cindy!” – Part Nine
THE TEN COMMANDMENTS OF ART –Take One
“Hey, Cindy!” – Part Ten
TOTALLY WIRED – AKA “Hey, Cindy!” – Part Eleven
THE INTERVIEW
WHEN I WAS – AKA Hey, Cindy!” – Part Twelve
ANOTHER SIDE OF BOB DYLAN: Volume Two: Act One – AKA “Hey, Cindy!” Part Thirteen
ME! ME! ME! – The Life & Death of an Artist – Part Two?
WAR ON DOCUMENTATION – AKA “Hey, Cindy!” – Part Fourteen
THE REBEL STAND – AKA “Hey, Cindy!” – Part Fifteen
ANOTHER SIDE OF BOB DYLAN: Volume Two: Act Two
DRUMMOND’S INTERNATIONAL GREY: This play contains “Hey, Cindy!” Parts Sixteen & Seventeen. It also contains the previous listed plays The Rebel Stand and The Bed
THE MILLION-STITCH BLANKET
IN SIXTY SECONDS
LOVE ON THE SOUP LINE
Chapter: 5
Written: 2019
THE BODEGA FIVE
Aired: the 24th of April 2024
The Bodega Five are five plays written in the Bodega 50 Café in N16 in the early months of 2019.
THE 25 PAINTINGS
PAINTED HEAD
WELCOME TO ALBION PARADE – AKA “Hey, Cindy!” Part Eighteen
96 TEARS
GO PLACES – DO THINGS
The 25 Paintings – this play is a totally different play to the one of the same name that got written in 2017. The GIFs mentioned in Painted Head are yet to be found, thus may have been lost. 96 Tears has also been lost but might be found before this book is bound in an edition of forty. Go Places – Do Things was written to be performed once. It was performed at the Bluecoat Chambers, Liverpool on Friday the 7th of June 2019.
Chapter: 6
Written: 2019
DO YOU PAINT?
Aired: the 1st of May 2024
Do You Paint? was a ten second play by Tenzing Scott Brown.
It was published on the Penkiln Burn site on the 6th of May.
Chapter: 7
Written: 2019
WHITE SAVIOUR COMPLEX
Aired: the 8th of May 2024
White Saviour Complex was the first of Tenzing Scott Brown’s plays to be published in book form. White Saviour Complex, the book, was published by Penkiln Burn Books in an edition of 400 copies. All copies of this book have now been sold. White Saviour Complex, the book, contains two versions of the play. The second version of the play contained in the book was performed numerous times in the Autumn months of 2019at picture houses across the Atlantic Archipelago.
There were to be numerous more performances of White Saviour Complex in the Spring of 2020, but these performances got cancelled because of Covid. Tam Dean Burn took the leading role in all of these performances.
Chapter: 8
Written: 2019
DOWN
Aired: the 15th of May 2024
Down is a collection of fourteen plays written in the latter months of 2019 and January 2020. There is no theme that holds them together, other than the fact that Bill Drummond’s mind was going down, towards the darkness that followed. The titles of these fourteen plays are:
I DON’T LIKE IT
TWELVE STEPS – 2025
PAINTING
FAME
HOT CROSS BORDER: Acts One & Three are also “Hey, Cindy!” Parts Nineteen & Twenty
CANNIBALS ATE MY UNCLE
ELVIS WANTS ME FOR A MOONBEAM
BLURB
THE LONELY SPY
WORM
IT’S THE NEW THING – (It’s The New Thing has been lost.) Hot Cross Border was performed on Friday the 19th of April 2022, on the border between County Derry and County Donegal, in Ireland.
HALF TIME
NO SPARE TYRE
QUESTIONS! QUESTIONS! QUESTIONS!
Chapter: 9
Written: 2020
MARMALADE TIME
Aired: the 22nd of May 2024
Marmalade Time is not a play, but a statement of a mindset. This mindset informed the writing of Dark End of The Street.
Chapter: 10
Written: 2020
DARK END OF THE STREET
Aired: the 29th of May 2024
Dark End of The Street was only conceived as a play in 2021.
Although...
Act One of Dark End of The Street was unknowingly performed in 2020. This unknowing performance of Act Onewas performed in real time over a period of four months after Bill Drummond had his first major brain seizure and through the first of the Covid lockdowns. Act One of Dark End of The Street consisted of Bill Drummond fillingten Black n’ Red Notebooks with his pencil-driven writings. They were a form of memoir. They start at the point when he was woken by an earth tremor in a monastery on the south coast of Crete. Each section of these handwritten notes in these ten notebooks takes it in turn to move forwards and backwards in time. They go all the way back to his earliest memories but only as far forward as a scene at night in a street after a gig by Echo & The Bunnymen in 1983. The street is in San Francisco, California.
Acts Two and Three of Dark End of The Street will also be performed in real time, but not until some ungiven time in the future.
Chapter: 11
Written: 2020
FIRE VERSUS TOWER
Aired: the 5th of June 2024
Fire Versus Tower was written to be performed in the back garden of The Curfew Tower on the evening of Wednesday the 5th of August 2020. But due to Covid it was not performed in the back garden of The Curfew Tower until the evening of Wednesday the 10th of August 2022.
Chapter: 12
Written: 2020
THE NEW RIVER FOUR
Aired: the 12th of June 2024
The New River Four are four Forty Second plays written in the New River Café in N16.
THE GLORIFIED WALKING STICK
THERE IS AN AFTER LIFE
THE PUBLIC EXECUTION OF POP STARS
THE NICK KERSHAW MINI FIG
The New River Four may have been recorded by Bill Drummond and broadcast on BBC 6 Music. But due to Bill Drummond’s burgeoning memory loss, he is unsure.
The New River Four can be performed inside your head by reading the plays while sitting at the corner table of The New River Café in N16.
Chapter: 13
Written: 2020
TOP DECK TWO
Aired: the 19th of June 2024
Top Deck Two are two plays written on the top deck of various buses leaving Southgate Bus Station between Covid lockdowns. Bill Drummond is now of an age to have a Freedom Pass, meaning that he can go anywhere in Greater London on public transport for free. The Top Deck Two plays have nothing in common with each other, other than the circumstances in which they were written.
BAD WISDOM – (Bad Wisdom is a stand-alone play, that is yet to be performed.)
THE MAN WHO BANGS HIS DRUM
Chapter: 14
Written: 2020
ANTIMACASSAR
Aired: the 26th of June 2024
Antimacassar is the title of a book that contains the play of the same name.
Antimacassar, the book, was published by Penkiln Burn Books in an edition of 400 copies. Antimacassar, the book, has sold out.
Antimacassar, the play,was to be performed in a drawing room in the city of Bingöl in Kurdistan. But due to Covid was never performed there. It can now be performed inside your head by visiting Best Gent Hair Saloon on Albion Parade, N16 and reading the copy of the book that sits on the coffee table in front of the sofa.
Chapter: 15
Written: 2020
BEST GENT HAIR SALOON
Aired: the 3rd of July 2024
Best Gent Hair Saloon is the title of a book containing two sets of four Forty Second plays. Best Gent Hair Saloon was published by Penkiln Books in an edition of 400 copies. Best Gent Hair Saloon, the book, has sold out.
All eight of the plays were written on the sofa in the Turkish barbers on Albion Parade N16, that has the name Best Gent Hair Saloon. The first set of plays is called The Open Door. The second set of plays is called I Could Have Been a Slave Owner.
THE OPEN DOOR
SOFA
HOT TOWEL
CUT THROAT
TWO EMPTY MILK BOTTLES
I COULD HAVE BEEN A SLAVE OWNER:
THE SPREADING SEED
MISTRESS WIKIPEDIA & MASTER GOOGLE
YER MAIST DETESTABLE FEATURE
NO DON! NO DON! NO DON! HELP! MURDER!
The characters in The Open Door plays are all inanimate objects. These plays are to be performed inside your head as you read them while sitting on the sofa inside Best Gent Hair Saloon, Albion Parade, N16. Although the four plays within I Could Have Been A Slave Owner have human characters, it is still best if you perform them inside your head while sitting on the sofa in Best Gent Hair Saloon.
At the time of writing, a copy of both Antimacassar and Best Gent Hair Saloon lie on the table in Best Gent Hair Saloon for you to read while performing the plays inside your head. The entry price for each of these performances is the cost of a shave, haircut or threading. It has been suggested that these plays could be performed in other Turkish or Kurdish barbers across these islands. Or anywhere in Bingöl, Kurdistan.
Chapter: 16
Written: 2020
FOUR FORTY SECONDS
Aired: the 10th of July 2024
Four Forty Seconds are four Forty Second Plays written in the Autumn months of 2020.
WAX & WAYNE
FORGIVE ME NOT
NEEDLE & GROOVE
TWO CLOUDS
These four plays will perform themselves without human interference.
Chapter: 17
Written: 2020
THE PENKILN BURN & ME
Aired: the 17th of July 2024
The Penkiln Burn & Me is a long-form play to be performed in real time.
The Penkiln Burn & Me was conceived by Tenzing Scott Brown in November 2020. It is yet to be performed.
Bill Drummond hopes it can be performed before he is too old to be a member of its audience.
Chapter: 18
Written: 2020
NO MUSIC DAY
Aired: the 24th of July 2024
No Music Day was only conceived as a play after it had already been performed as a play. This unknowingly performed play was first performed in Vienna on the 21st of November 2020. The performance was directed by the Austrian composer Scharmien Zandi. Scharmien Zandi has since directed performances of No Music Day on the 21st of November 2021 and the 21st of November 2022.
Chapter: 19
Written: 2020
THE PIED WAGTAIL
Aired: the 31st of July 2024
The Pied Wagtail is a book published in 2022.
The Pied Wagtail, the play of the same name, was written in December 2020. The Pied Wagtail is either three separate short plays or one Three-Act play. If The Pied Wagtail is three separate plays, they are:
YOU BETTER TAKE OFF YOUR HOMBURG
ELVIS LOVES BILL
RIGHT & WRONG
The Pied Wagtail, the book, was published in an edition of 400 in the early Summer of 2022. At the time of writing (in early Autumn 2022) there are a few copies of this book left for sale.
The Pied Wagtail can be performed by wooden puppets pretending to be humans.
Or...
The Pied Wagtail can be performed by humans pretending to be wooden puppets.
Or...
The Pied Wagtail can be performed inside your head by reading the play while sitting on the eight-sided bench outside Southgate Tube Station.
Chapter: 20
Written: 2021
THREE FORTY SECOND PLAYS
Aired: the 7th of August 2024
Three Forty Second Plays are three Forty Seconds Plays to be performed by inanimate objects during the dead of night in locked rooms in complete darkness, with no humans in attendance.
MY OLD FRIEND
I AM ECHO
CROCKS, HEVVO, PORKY & DRIZZ
Chapter: 21
Written: 2021
HOW TO SELL YOUR SOUL TO THE DEVIL – NOT!
Aired: the 14th of August 2024
How To Sell Your Soul to The Devil – NOT! is an ongoing never-ending play performed in real time, in many people’s heads. Each performance takes a different route. Performers might not be aware they are performing it. The stage for this performance is global. The consequences of this performance may be eternal.
How To Sell Your Soul to The Devil – NOT! ended up being included in the book Semaphore Signals, but it can also be considered a stand-alone play.
Chapter: 22
Written: 2021
WHITE MALE GAZE
Aired: the 21st of August 2024
White Male Gaze, the play,was written in January 2021.
White Male Gaze is also the title of a book containing the play and was published by Penkiln Burn Books in an edition of 400 in early September 2021. White Male Gaze (the book) has long sold out.
Act Two of White Male Gaze is a play within a play.
The name of the play within a play is:
WHO ATE MY UNCLE?
Chapter: 23
Written: 2021
PAINT
Aired: the 28th of August 2024
Paint is the title of a book published by Penkiln Burn Books in an edition of 400. Paint contains three plays by Tenzing Scott Brown. These plays were written between December 2020 and May 2021. Paint was not published until late September 2022. The titles of the three plays included in Paint are:
LEARNING TO CROSS THE ROAD WITHOUT LOOKING
SIZEWELL TEA
TWA CAKES
All three of these plays relate to Art Schools in some way.
Chapter: 24
Written: 2021
SEMAPHORE SIGNALS
Aired: the 4th of September 2024
Semaphore Signals is the title of a book published by Penkiln Burn Books in an edition of 400. Semaphore Signals was written between June 2021 and July 2021. Semaphore Signals was not published until November 2022. Contained within the play Semaphore Signals are five Forty Second Plays. The names of these Forty Second Plays are:
TWA FLAGS
UNION & RAINBOW
LITTLE & LARGE
PAINTED LADIES
LITTLE WINGS
These five named plays grew in the writing, thus some of them are considerably longer than 40 seconds.
Semaphore Signals was written to be an imagined play. It is recommended that you visit the Breakout Café on Caledonian Road, London. And after ordering yourself whatever they have that you might want, find a seat looking across the road at the Pentonville Prison and read the book Semaphore Signals, and in that way you will be able to imagine the play taking place inside your head.
Chapter: 25
Written: 2021
THE EDGE OF THE WORLD
Aired: the 11th of September 2024
The Edge of The World is the title of a booklet printed in an edition of forty copies and only available at The 25 Paintings exhibition in Great Yarmouth in 2021. The Edge of the World contains the following six Forty Second plays, which were all written in Great Yarmouth. The characters in these six plays are all inanimate objects to be found within The 25 Paintings exhibition as it was displayed within PRIMEYARC, Great Yarmouth in September 2021.
330 & COAT
THE LONELIEST BED
THE UNBAKED CAKE
MOTHER
TWA PAIR O’ BROGUES
TWA TINS O’ GREY
The six plays contained within The Edge of The World were not performed by the inanimate objects that are the characters in these plays, but by visitors to The 25 Paintings’ Tea Rooms, in Corby, in June 2022. The performance was carried out by these visitors painting the manuscripts of these six plays on the back of the six pertinent canvasses.
Chapter: 26
Written: 2021
THE! THE! THE!
Aired: the 18th of September 2024
The! The! The! are three plays that should have been included in the publication The Edge of The World. But they fell off the edge before it went to print. Neither were they performed at The 25 Paintings’ Tea Rooms in Corby. It is hoped that they will be performed in 2023 in the same way as the six plays included in The Edge of The World were performed in Corby 2022. The titles of The! The! The! are...
THE BROOM
THE DRUM
THE HORN
The! The! The! are plays to be performed in real time with no audience. Each of the performances lasts as long as a piece of string.
Chapter: 27
Written: 2021
THE OTHER TWO
Aired: the 25th of September 2024
The Other Two are two other plays conceived in Great Yarmouth during the time of The 25 Paintings exhibition there in 2021.
UNHALFBRICKING
MY BLOOD FOR YOUR BLOOD
Unhalfbricking was performed only once, by Tam Dean Burn at The 25 Paintings’ exhibition in PRIMEYARC, Great Yarmouth in September 2021. Unhalfbricking may be performed again.
My Blood For Your Blood was performed in the West Midlands, over a period of two years starting from September 2021.
Chapter: 28
Written: 2021
SPECK OF DUST
Aired: the 2nd of October 2024
Speck of Dust is a play in three acts. The three acts in Speck of Dust have the title SPECK, OF and DUST. Speck of Dust was performedand is still being performed in real time.
Chapter: 29
Written: 2021
DRY RUN
Dry Run was performed by The Real Bill Drummond and forty members of Our Seventeen. Dry Run was performed in Great Yarmouth in the September of 2021. Dry Run was the dry run of a play to be named Before During After.
Our Seventeen are a tribute choir to The17. The17 were a choir that existed between 2003 and 2013. It is claimed that The17 had more living members than any other choir in the world.
Chapter: 30
Written: 2021
BEFORE DURING AFTER
Before During After became a fully-fledged play that can be performed with and for forty members of the public. Before During After has as yet only been performed once, in Corby during The 25 Paintings’ Tea Rooms in early July 2022. It was performed by a Tribute Bill Drummond and forty members of Our Seventeen.
Chapter: 31
Written: 2021
TEN SIXTY SECONDS
Ten Sixty Seconds is performed by one actor performing any ten of Bill Drummond’s 60 Sixty Second Films, which were originally performed by Bill Drummond and filmed by Tracey Moberly between 2012 and 2018. It is hoped that the screenplay of these 60 Sixty Second Films will be published at a later date by Penkiln Burn Books. In the meantime, any interested party wanting to perform this play can visit the website http://www.60sixtyseconds.com/ and transcribe any ten of the Sixty Second Films there.
Chapter: 32
Written: 2021
THREE FORTY MINUTES
THREE FORTY MINUTES
Three Forty Minutes is performed by two actors performing any three of the 40 Forty Minute Interviews carried out by Bill Drummond between 2016 and some unknown date in the future, when it is hoped that he will have completed his 40 Forty Minute Interviews. At which time each of these Forty Minute interviews will have been transcribed and it is hoped that Penkiln Burn Books will publish these transcriptions in a book with the title FORTY.
Chapter: 33
Written: 2021
THE 25 PAINTINGS
This might be the third play by Tenzing Scott Brown to have this title. It is also the final play by Tenzing Scott Brown to have this title.
Chapter: 34
Written: 2021
PAST
Past is the collective title of seventeen Forty Second* plays, written for Grant McPhee as content for his proposed film Revolutionary Spirit. These seventeen plays were performed by The Penkiln Burn Players while each of them stood in the middle of the actual flowing waters of the Penkiln Burn in Galloway on the 21st and 22nd of April 2022. These performances were directed by Tam Dean Burn and filmed by Tracey Moberly.
The title of the seventeen plays included in Past are as follows:
DRUMBO ONE
DRUMBO TWO
DRUMBO THREE
DRUMBO FOUR
DRUMBO FIVE
DRUMBO SIX
DRUMBO SEVEN
DRUMBO EIGHT
DRUMBO NINE
DRUMBO TEN
DRUMBO ELEVEN
DRUMBO TWELVE
DRUMBO THIRTEEN
DRUMBO FOURTEEN
DRUMBO SIXTEEN
DRUMBO SEVENTEEN
It is not known if the seventeen plays included in Past will ever be performed again.
*Although these seventeen plays included in Past are billed as Forty Second Plays, most of them take considerably more than 40 seconds to be performed.
Chapter: 35
Written: 2021
UNDER THE JUNCTION
Under The Junction was the last play that Tenzing Scott Brown wrote.
Under The Junction was performed in real time over the autumn months of 2021.
Under The Junction was performed inside the head of Bill Drummond as he transitioned into becoming The Elderly Gentleman.
Under The Junction was published by Penkiln Burn Books in an edition of 400, in the autumn months of 2022.
Tenzing Scott Brown died in the early days of January 2022, when he either fell or was pushed under the wheels of a bus heading along Chase Side towards Potters Bar.
